Today I will be as useless as the “g” in “lasagna”.
Destination: Isolation.
A few days ago, I was putting up my Christmas decorations, singing my favorite Christmas songs just to get on my sons’ nerves while sipping on my favorite beverage. I was thinking about how happy and fortunate I truly was. I thought I had all the time in the world to get my shopping done in time for Christmas and to make this Christmas more memorable than all the others. After all, I thought, this is the season of perpetual hope!
If you are anything like me, you are probably trying to juggle your own family holiday traditions against the litany of seasonal obligations—office parties, invitations to countless cookie exchanges, volunteer opportunities, and holiday productions—you are also very likely in need of a moment of levity.
Two days ago, I got extremely sick. Just out of the blue, I got this weird cold, but stronger than cold / flu, but still a little different than flu ailment. Worried it might be the c-word, I went to get tested and sure enough, it came out POSITIVE for COVID-19. It was really strange for me to receive such results. I dodged it so well for the past two years while everyone else around me was getting sick. I couldn’t help but wonder why now? And so close to Christmas? When I have so much to do and so little time to do it!
Today I’m stuck at home with an enormous headache that won’t quit, tightness in my chest, snot leaking out of my nose and eyes … My sons are refusing to get near me (and with good reason), and …
No one is bringing me tea!
The high fever is making my skin ache. This horrible cough is hurting my throat. I feel miserable, afraid, and a little lonely. My body feels heavy and is refusing to move off this couch. It has had enough and it wants me to stay put! There is no going out to do Christmas shopping today and it’s too late for shopping online.
COVID-19 is helping me see how unimportant all of it really is. How in moment’s time everything can change. How, just two days ago, I had all kinds of energy to do all kinds of things, and today, I can barely hold my head up long enough to type up this blog post. And honestly, as I lay alone on this couch in my nicely decorated living-room, thinking of all the things that won’t get done, I am not even stressing over it. I am just happy to be here. To be alive. To hear my sons tease me about having a “plague” and to know that they’re doing that to make me laugh and, people who go out of their way to make me laugh are my favorite types of people.
Regardless whether you show up or skip all of those festivities and events, people who love you will still love you and will go out of their way to make you laugh.
So, I guess what I’m trying to say is–and Bob McFerrin said it best–“In every life we have some trouble, but when you worry you make it double. Don’t worry. Be happy.”
Love always,
Sanela